Gaining Steam

I have come pretty far in my first 18 months of recovery, but I know I will have a long battle and way to grow for the rest of my life. What is it they keep telling me? My addiction is waiting for me in the parking lot to kick the hell out of me and destroy me and my life all over again? I say NO WAY! Time to put the gloves back on. I have a deep, growing anger toward this disease, and I plan to unleash my fury in the most impactful ways I can.

I am taking a brief break from my online Master’s program to get reorganized. My employer wants to share about the dangers of not disposing of prescriptions properly (and believe me that is impactful). Okay let’s say it is meaningful. I was researching for this share for him and came across a really good website for addiction. This woman looks much younger than I and has done some amazing things with her site.

It got me to wondering if I should keep my site going, or hire someone to help me do to this one what she has done to hers: (click on this link and check it out)



I’m not sure if it is linked to a national website for NM to use it or what but there are so many great resources built into it. My generation, I just don’t have the same computer skills, so if I decide to keep this site going, I will need LOTS OF HELP redesigning its purpose and functions.

Yesterday’s Just For Today message said: “Build, don’t destroy” — “our negative sense of self has been replaced by a positive concern for others,” and the message’s content was about not feeding gossip or the darkness of negativity. I want to help; that’s given number one. I want to get involved; that’s given number two. I need to continue my education while working full-time toward the end goal of walking a new career path and a life in another location. So, for now, I will continue to just blog until I can get assistance to redesign this site and make it more functional; to help those with addiction.

The women at the office are still gossiping and playing their games, but I just smile and give it all to my HP. I am the most fearless that I have ever been and it feels so good and so liberating to know that I can do what I want with my life. Nobody can control my life anymore. What a great realization. Changing our thoughts to change our behaviors; that’s Cognitive Behavioral Thinking in a nutshell.

If something is driving you emotionally crazy, stop and ask yourself how you can look at it differently so it feels good instead of bad; rewind and re-frame it.

I plan to enjoy myself while I am between classes. It was the right moment and the right decision in order to get a chance to relieve the pressure. I will be working more efficiently. I have also learned my limitations (due to the damage my addiction caused). I have a visual memory impairment; so I am researching methods to improve my slow reading limitation. Let me know if you have any recommendations.

Peace, love and blessings to all who read this….


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s