Gratitude Vs. Selfishness

I have heard many people share in the rooms that they use gratitude lists in their step work to remind them of where they came from, to be grateful for what they have, especially their sobriety; to allow themselves to be humble.  As I complete Step 1 and admit to myself and my sponsor that my life has become unmanageable, and that I am willing to surrender control of my life to a loving God as I understand Him, I have realized just how much I have to be grateful for, and humbly, I can see all the areas where I must seek forgiveness, forgive OTHERS, and forgive myself.  I actually made Forgiveness Lists too.  These exercises are very cathartic and assist me in growing in my recovery.

It’s a beautiful winter day.  It’s the Christmas season; which is often a difficult time for many, myself included. But this year, being clean now for 48 days, I CHOOSE to be JOYFUL…and GRATEFUL, rather than sad that my mom and my husband are no longer here to share it.  I have my children, siblings and their spouses, nieces and their spouses, nephews and their spouses and their children, and am blessed to still have my father.  I have a couple close friends here, and many others I am getting to know in the program.

It’s a good time for me to watch the classics too —It’s a Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th Street, Home for the Holidays, the Santa Claus, and Christmas Vacation are all my favorites.  I plan to go do a small Christmas venture today in that I will get down my decorations and Christmas tree, do a little shopping, go to a meeting, and remember all the while what the real meaning of Christmas is all about.  Today I will be grateful for all the loved ones I have had, and those I still have in my life!  Have a blessed day!

I also want to add that I am SO GRATEFUL FOR MY CHILDREN AND THEIR HONESTY, OPENMINDEDNESS, AND WILLINGNESS TO SUPPORT ME BY ATTENDING MEETINGS WITH ME ESPECIALLY DURING THE HOLIDAY BREAK! I look forward to sharing the experience with them of hearing someone in the rooms share their experience, strength and hope. Peace, love and blessings.

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